“My mother-in-law is well spoken of and I agree with her, but I don’t want to live with her anymore.”
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, as an “eternal problem”, is a mess in many families.Especially in modern society, many young couples have to ask their mother-in-law to help take care of their children, living under the same roof, it is very easy to conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.For example, the day before yesterday, I saw a treasure mother posted, saying that her mother-in-law has been helping to take care of her baby at home for three years. All her relatives and friends praised her for her good fortune. She had such a “good mother-in-law” who worked hard and did not complain.The precious mother also admitted that in the past three years, her mother-in-law has taken care of the house in perfect order. She has never been tired of taking care of the children. She has prepared every meal on time.In terms of economy, the mother-in-law is never stingy. When bao Ma was in confinement, she would buy red mushrooms at any time. Knowing that her daughter-in-law likes to eat durian, she would buy them every three days.However, the precious mother couldn’t help complaining that she just couldn’t live with her mother-in-law any more.Because although the mother-in-law is really good, but in life, there are still many differences with bao Ma, from time to time there are some small friction.For example, outside the home house is the road, every day the motor vehicle roared past, treasure mother repeatedly emphasized to her mother-in-law, do not walk in such an environment, very dangerous, but the mother-in-law said everyone will look at the road, can not have something, is treasure mother worry too much.The mother-in-law will often play some “square dance divine Comedy” at home, from time to time to turn the volume to the maximum self-intoxication, and occasionally play for the children to listen to, bao Mother felt very noisy, specially made several suggestions, but the mother-in-law still go her own way.Although from the general direction, the mother-in-law is indeed a recognized “angel mother-in-law”, but it is because of these trivial things in life, make the treasure mother more and more resistant to the mother-in-law, and even have self-doubt, don’t you know gratitude, don’t know the people?It is believed that in real life, many precious mothers have similar troubles. The old man has worked so hard to help take care of his children. As a child, it should be grateful.However, many mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is irreconcilable, precisely lies in these contradictions “add up”, over time, has become the fuse of the breakdown of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship.As the most special kind of family relationship, there is no blood relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but they have to live together. They have neither “emotional basis” nor the same living habits. If they lose the sense of boundary, it is almost inevitable that there will be various contradictions.Especially some mother-in-law rightfully think as “family” and only son, daughter-in-law is an outsider, regularly for small families, interfere in each other’s life, though helping their children with Eva, do household chores, in the eyes of outsiders conscientiously, work unceasingly, is actually “such as people drinking water affair”, the children of a life, not necessarily as happiness with others.Once the difference between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is too large, or there is a conflict in character, it is easy to make the contradiction is further stimulated, resulting in the rupture of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and even marriage problems.For the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, keeping a certain distance is the best solution, the so-called “far fragrance, near smell”, and keep a certain distance from her mother-in-law, can bring fundamental changes to the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.If both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can maintain clear boundaries, do not wantonly interfere in each other’s lives, and leave a certain family system boundary for each other, the problems of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will naturally be reduced. Mother-in-law cares and understands her daughter-in-law, and her daughter-in-law respects and understands her mother-in-law.Of course, many modern families have no choice but to bring the mother-in-law home to help with childcare and live under the same roof, where a son’s presence is crucial.If the son, as the head of the family, can handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, define the scope of rights for his mother, when there is a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, can mediate, stand in the perspective of both sides to think about the problem, to achieve empathy, can also be a good solution to the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, make the family relationship more harmonious.Therefore, in order to better solve the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should have a sense of boundary, keep a certain distance, do not interfere in each other’s life, and the son should play a good role in it, only we work together, can solve the problem from the root.Crooked mother conclusion: as the saying goes, “strong twist melon is not sweet”, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is actually so, if there are too many differences between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, forced integration, adaptation will only let each other torture each other.Good relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, need to maintain a certain sense of distance between the two, if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law really can not get along, appropriately increase the distance, reduce contact is the best solution.
Topic of the day: Do you have a similar mother-in-law?